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Peer reviews should provide feedback to a peer on the criteria expected in the paper. The Week 8 Feedback Form can be downloaded from the Appendices section of the course guide by clicking the link here. Follow these instructions:

For Online Students:

  1. Choose a classmate’s paper from the “Easy Drop off/Pick up Zone” discussion thread in the course shell.
  2. Obtain the Peer Review Feedback Form from the course shell. 
  3. Comment on all criteria, noting strengths and / or areas for improvement on the feedback form. 
  4. Provide completed Peer Review Feedback Form by posting it to the same “Easy Drop off/Pick up Zone” discussion thread AND submitting it to the Peer Review Assignment link above.






Appendix A: Peer Review Feedback Form 2

Reviewer’s Name: _

Date: __

Writer’s Assigned #: _




Assignment4:PersuasivePaperPart2:Solution and Advantages



1)       Receiveaclassmate’spaperfrom yourprofessor(inclassifon-ground;bye-mailifonline).

2)       CopythePeerReviewFeedbackFormfromtheAppendix.

3)       Commentonallcriteria,notingstrengthsand/orareasforimprovementonthefeedbackform.

4)       ProvidecompletedPeerReviewFeedbackFormandclassmate’spapertoyourprofessor.




+ Strengths

Comments < Areas for Improvement

Part 1

1. Revise, using feedbackfromthe professorandclassmates, your Persuasive PaperPart I- A ProblemExists.



Part 2

2. Includeda defensible, relevantthesisstatement clearlyin the firstparagraph.



3. Explain adetailed, viablesolution thatsupportsyour thesis. Thisshould be one ortwo (1-2) paragraphs.



4. State, explain, and support thefirstadvantage (economic,social,political,environmental,social, equitable,ethical/moral, etc.)to yoursolution.Thisshould be one ortwo(1-2) paragraphs.



5. State, explain, and support thesecondadvantage (economic,social,political,environmental,social, equitable,ethical/moral, etc.)to yoursolution.Thisshould be one ortwo(1-2) paragraphs.



6. State, explain, and support the third (and fourth if desired) advantage (economic, social, political, environment, social, equitable, ethical/moral, etc.) to your solution. This should be one or two (1-2) paragraphs.



7. Use effective transitional words, phrases, and sentences.



8. Provide aconcluding paragraph

/transitionalparagraph that summarizestheproposedsolution and itsadvantages.



9. Develop a coherently structured paper with an introduction, body, and conclusion.



10. Use one or more rhetorical strategies (ethos, logos, pathos) to explain advantages.



11. Support advantage claimswith atleast three(3) additional quality relevant references. Useat least six (6) total for Parts 1 & 2.



12. Other












and the chosen one



            The purpose of this paper is to show you that possibly through proper taxation and implementation the government could help set up some sort of healthcare system for those who are effected by alcohol and smoking related illness, through either direct access or secondhand means.

(Did double spacing so as to separate abstract from actual paper for page number purposes).

Throughout the many years of service I have committed to a top pharmacy in the nation, I have spoken to many people regarding their use of cigarettes and alcohol. Why do they smoke/drink? What kind do they like? Their favorite time of day to smoke? Just to ring the amount of smoking to their attention to help raise awareness of smoking, to no avail for the most part. Over the years I have noticed the toll these have taken on my everyday customers, from the mental dependence on the two to the physical detriments that it can cause. More and more I see customers come in to get medication to treat the ailments that these vices could cause. Paying out of pocket on some medication costing a lot, often I found myself asking myself the question “What if we taxed the two too and use the money on programs that will help the population deal with whatever issue they may need help with?”

             When nearly 1 out of every five people you know will develop some smoking-related disease (Jamal, 2015) wouldn’t you want them to have some support system to help the recover or rehabilitate the issue that would be present? From personal experience I have seen the hardship such a detrimental disease could have on one person body and pocketbook. I am sure you know someone who may be suffering from the symptom that these diseases can cause. Then for the alcohol related side you have 30 percent of eligible drinkers don’t drink at all, another 30 percent drinks less than one per week. As for the opposite end, the top 10 percent of drinkers consume an average of 74 drinks a week (Ingraham, 2014). These binge drinking, or even just moderate drinking over time, can cause serious health effects like cirrhosis, which can cause your liver to fail. It is the leading cause (1 in 3) for liver transplants in the United States (Singal, 2013).

Another issue that comes with large consumptions of anything (tobacco or alcohol) can lead to a mental dependence on it called “Addiction.” Addiction to Alcohol and tobacco is pretty common amongst those who consume them. This addiction can be fierce when trying to get over them; some people can shirk it like no problem while others go through the fire and back (because of the detox they may come from the ability not have them no more). These are treated with programs that are designed to help the individual overcome the nasty addiction.

One of the biggest programs set up to help combat alcohol addiction is AA (Alcohol Anonymous). This group (based on the book published in 1939) was specifically created to help those who have had a bad experience due to the addiction or who are having a hard time beating the addiction on their own. They use a 12 step process which focuses on the individual with a strong support system; they typically are non-professional everyday persons like us who are trying to help people help themselves as well as working on themselves too.

Nicotine is treated mainly by oneself, or with the help (encouragement) of others. Some people have the ability to go cold turkey and not have a problem with it. Though for some it is a much harder task to accomplish, for some it takes the push of others to get them to quit, but for many, they have to seek further help to quit. The help usually received is a talk with the doctor and knowledge about the smoking cessation options (nicotine gum, nicotine lozenges/patches). If they feel like further help may be needed than there is help in the form of behavioral therapy. (C, 2015)

Another issue that comes to mind of selling alcohol and tobacco is why are we selling things that harm our customers, not in the immediate but the long term, how is that okay? Selling something that harms your customer is just bad business and not to mention morally wrong. You want your customers to come back, healthy, not to mention alive.


Over the six years of customer service experience, I have had the time to look into the things that have intrigued me. Taxes have always intrigued me because we don’t know the exact percentage we are paying in taxes with every transaction, for instance, did you know that when cigarettes were first introduced they were only taxed at .8 cents, then again this was back in 1864 (Fontinelle, 2009). It is currently taxed at roughly $1.01. These have been known to cause cancer and other severe health defects in both the smokers and those around the smoker through secondhand smoke. Alcohol has been the drink of man for decades, and that too is taxed based upon type (spirit, wine, and beer). My state adopted the spirit tax in 1935 (CA). The current tax being $3.30 per gallon of spirits (Alcohol rate, 2006). Why can’t we increase this, if any a little, to help pay for the rising medical cost?

(ADVANTAGES) Raising the taxes could help benefits numerous people in both first-hand manners and then again in an offhand type of way. The three ways in which I believe we could help people are:

1.     Raising taxes on them to help pay for the increasing medical expenses: Throughout the years the cost of everything is slowly but surely increasing, this includes the cost of medical services and equipment/materials. The biggest cause for the reason of a 91% increase in the cost of medical care is was an increase in the cost of the prescription medications, cost increase of medical devices and the increase of the care upon hospital visit. More than 16 million are living with a smoking-related disease, which costs a total of $300 Billion each year, $170 billion is used for direct medical related health problems for adults, with another $5.6 billion being used for secondhand smoke purposes. 

According to research a 10 % increase in overall price decreases smoking by 3 to 5 percent (C, 2016).

2.     Tax revenue used elsewhere: Roughly the US government get 30 million (federally) in money off of taxes from the current tax. If we increased the taxes, the money could not only be used in the programs you open it up with, but also on other much-needed programs that could help people in other health aspects, such as mental, or disability health. Just a 5 percent increase could help lower the number of smokers (which will lower overall cost of medical expenses because of less smokers) as well raising an additional 1.5 million which could go to great lengths to help these non-profit originations, which just barely scrape by.

3.     Raising taxes passive effect: Through raising taxes, studies have proven that it can help reduce the number of smokers or alcohol abusers. Within the nation. We can check this out by the simple conclusion on if the revenue is declining on the taxes then they must not be buying them as much, so that is why the revenue is declining (Cole, 2015).

4.     (Critical thinking making connections, please review professor)- Raising the taxes will help the poor save money in an offhand way. By raising the taxes it would have a more profound outcome on the poor since they will still be buying them (if they can) and they literally have a limited budget, when compared to someone more well off, the .$25 to $.50 extra per pack will eventually add up to a sum in which they could not afford to smoke till the next pay day and then it will continue to go that way, while compared to the more well off person who could afford it would continue with their addiction or habit.

Here is where they may benefit (depending upon outlook) because they would have to stop smoking due to financial reasons, their health will/ may get better because of health reasons for not smoking, the general overall health should improve, and on top of that since they would not be able to afford their cigarettes they may be able to use that money on improving their lives (Remler,2004).

5.     Add the tax to road tickets- We could add a small tax on all tickets served and call it a “public service tax.” This may work because of the fact that it would be a further deterrent to all the people who frequently break the laws of the road.  And by paying the ticket. they are contributing to something that would better someone else life.

All of the above health detriments should be reason enough alone to want to help your friends if not just the random person who may not be able to afford the healthcare needed for the treatments of smoking and alcohol-related illness, and if somehow the revenue gets ahead we can place extra tax revenue not being spent on these programs and put it towards other public healthcare programs so as to help with whatever is facing society today. I feel programs like these are essential to our society to show that we care for each other.

From the way I see it according to the math and the layout possibilities, this is very much possible. The profound use of monies obtained through these taxes could be the edge many people need to stop drinking (or at least consume less) due to awareness and group that can help them work through their drinking issues.

I feel like this isn’t about a question of if a tax should be added to the two products in question, but rather should we apply a tax on something that isn’t healthy for you so as to help those who become unhealthy from it later? This shouldn’t be a hard question since it “should” be human nature to want to help people out, but that is found very rarely today, this will provide us the opportunity to give back with a little effort from us, and if the customers don’t want to help pay the tax then they just don’t have to buy the product.

















Stone, L. (2014, August 5). When Did Your State Adopt Its Tax on Distilled Spirits? Retrieved August 05, 2016, from http://taxfoundation.org/blog/when-did-your-state-adopt-its-tax-distilled-spirits

Alcohol Rates 2000-2010, 2013-2015. (2006, December 07). Retrieved August 05, 2016, from http://www.taxpolicycenter.org/statistics/alcohol-rates-2000-2010-2013-2015

Cole, A. (2015, May 8). Federal Tobacco Tax Revenues are declining. Retrieved August 05, 2016, from http://taxfoundation.org/blog/federal-tobacco-tax-revenues-are-declining

Jamal, A. (2015, November 13). Current Cigarette Smoking Among Adults — United States, 2005–2014. Retrieved August 06, 2016, from http://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/preview/mmwrhtml/mm6444a2.htm?s_cid=mm6444a2_w

Singal, A. (2013, March 13). Using PubMed. Retrieved August 06, 2016, from http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed?cmd=search

C, C. D. (2015). Quitting Smoking. Retrieved August 21, 2016, from http://www.cdc.gov/tobacco/data_statistics/fact_sheets/cessation/quitting/

C, C. D. (2016, July 18). Economic Facts About U.S. Tobacco Production and Use. Retrieved August 21, 2016, from http://www.cdc.gov/tobacco/data_statistics/fact_sheets/economics/econ_facts/

Remler, D. K. (2004, February). Poor Smokers, Poor Quitters, and Cigarette Tax Regressivity. Retrieved August 21, 2016, from http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1448232/


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